Notes from a parish cat and his author Julie Mackenzie

My photo
I am Father Tom Fish, esteemed member of the religious team at Temptation of Christ Parish in the novels by author Julie Mackenzie. As to my background, I was invited into the rectory as a stray, laid on the charm, and was invited to stay, even honorarily ordained and no less spiritual than my sidekick Father Will. He dotes on me to high heaven and forgives all of my street cat proclivities, whatever the hell that means.

Monday, December 31, 2018

A New Year Ahead and All the Best

Hello, friends,

Here we are the last day of 2018. Don't really know what to say except there's one thing that always comes up. Hope.

Chances are this next year is going to be pretty much the same as the last, but there's always hope that we'll all get through it in good health and without too much hurt or pain.

We hope for surprises, laughter and friends that'll be there for us.

Like you.

All the best to you in 2019 and let's continue to enjoy our sun puddles and our dreams.

My friend Bridget and I when she was just a kitten.
Take care,

Monday, December 24, 2018

Christmas Eve..and the Sound of Wailing!

Every sad story needs a happy ending, don't you agree?

Here's a night before Christmas poem that starts out sad, but I make sure everyone in it discovers the true holiday spirit!

Hope you enjoyed it!

Here's one of my favorite manger scenes:

Now THAT'S where the true Christmas spirit began.

Many blessings and Merry Christmas!


Monday, December 17, 2018

Sweet Dreams

Hello, furries and your minions!

I post on Mancat Mondays because (duh) I'm a cat of the male gender. Does that engender affection from females? Sweet, soft, luscious and affectionate ladycats? Sweet, darling and adoring human ladies? I should say it does, as any red-blooded male will tell you.

As you all know, my number one fan is ladycat and friend Miss Bridget de la Furr. After she cleans my ears, she will lie down next to me and sleep. Totally understandable since I know that task can be very tiring!

Aren't I lucky? Sorry, mates, you're going to have to find your own ear-cleaning sweetheart!

The last week before Christmas. Can you believe it? The reverends are afraid we'll run out of candles. It's funny, all they have to do is get the word out through the housekeeper and packages appear on our doorstep. I wonder if I can order some catnip plants..

A final word, my friends: Take things in stride, nap in between and always dream. Always. x


Monday, December 10, 2018


Hi, efurrybody in holiday land!

The days are going by fast and furious and we're finding ourselves catching up with our Advent calendar. We never seem to get it in time to open the first door on the first day of December. Does that happen to you? Maybe if we got one with treats behind doors, like chocolate or cheese (for me!) it would give us the incentive to get our calendar when we're supposed to!

Here is what we have so far this month. Check out today's door!

Hope you have your calendar handy. If not, we'll share this one with you every so often. (Only if there's an exciting door reveal, ha!)

Finally, remember, we cats love to open doors. One every day? Sheer heaven!

Merry Christmas!

Sunday, December 2, 2018

Mancat Monday Sharing

Hi, everyone and holiday greetings to you all!

We've started to get cards here at the rectory. Because of a tight budget (I don't know why, since I'm bringing in extra cash by the fistfuls in collection plates) I didn't send out as many cards as I would have liked. Soo..I decided to share with you my designs and what the housekeeper and I worked on for the holidays.

Here's one of them: Me with my mancat wannabes, lol!

The other was this one:

It has a lot of the elements that are regular features on my Facebook Page.  Come visit and I know you'll want to follow along. My blog gives me a chance to share a little more than FB gives me room to, though, like letting you know there are big plans for me in 2019. I can't believe we're headed for a brand-new decade! I just hope it doesn't sneak up too quick!

And finally, friends, I'm thankful and hopeful that this is a good holiday season for all of you. We'll still be sharing our nuttiness in the weeks and months to come.

With all the little lights, singular beacons, I have this question: Does the candle in the window mean you're happy to give me treats??

Monday, November 26, 2018

Cruisin' With Will or I'll Never Live It Down

Happy Mancat Monday, furry folk!

It might be mancat Monday today, but I didn't feel very mancatish on Saturday when Will wanted to take his car out. Usually parked in the church parking lot and covered up to a fare-thee-well by the meticulous asp that he is, I had forgotten the embarrassment of it all. So, off we go, me sinking down in the seat with every sighting of humans or even cats for that matter.

See what I mean? Would you be caught dead in this pink marshmallowy, over-chromed, toothy grilled, poor excuse for a vehicle? The "Pink Pew" my paw!!

Anyway, it's Monday and I'm back to my normally very mancat self and all's good. The candy-coated, pink icinged, powder puff car is back under its tarp where it belongs. The next time Will gets that venturesome gleam in his eye, remind me to make myself scarce!

Recovering from dis-grace,

Tuesday, November 20, 2018

Early Thanksgiving Frenzy

Hey, sports fans! (or not) ~

With Thanksgiving this week, you would think a tornado hit the rectory. We have turkeys coming out of our @#$% ears, stuffing everywhere, the reverends in a heated discussion over jellied cranberry sauce versus cooked berries and the housekeeper has started her Christmas shopping. Next thing you know Santa won't be driving a sleigh with reindeer, he'll have turkeys instead! It's crazy!

I've always had this thing about hiding and secrets. A cat doesn't like secrets. Humans have to understand that closed doors make us nuts, strange noises or smells are unsettling and not to know what's freshly purchased in an obvious department store bag is the ultimate exercise in teasing.

So, if there are going to be Christmas purchases, let them remain hidden for the sake of my sanity, please!

All for now. Holy man over and out!


Monday, November 12, 2018

Mancat Monday Thoughts

Hi, everybody!

This has been a solemn weekend. Veterans Day was commemorated yesterday and the housekeeper captured me in my new recruit uniform (they even trimmed my head furs like they do in the real service.)

Of course, I never served, but I wish I had. So does the housekeeper, just setting aside a few years to give to one's country. She's too old now to get into a uniform and I'm a cat, so we're just going to appreciate those who did and do what we can, like volunteering. She went ahead already and got her clearance with complete background check to work with veterans come spring..Me? I might go along, if they let me.

So, all for now and now, for all - blessings and peace.


Monday, November 5, 2018

Putting Me to Work

This appeared in the church bulletin yesterday. I take umbrage with the "cheap" part.

The housekeeper thinks that if I'm such a mancat, I should be earning some money. She has farmed me out as an expert on how things should read. I grudgingly accepted my first assignment. What a disaster!

Here's a portion of what I had to correct until I gave up to save my sanity: (a letter presumably to some cat toy company by a parishioner who should go back to school)

Deer Slurs  To Whom It May Concern:

I bot  bought this Clap Trap Rat Trap cat toy online and it is crap. (We do not say crap when trying to fix the problem!!) Say: It is not functioning properly!! It wunt won't work. I tried  effrything  everything. I spent my last pennee penny..

It was at this point I became suspicious. I just KNOW some individual who shall remain nameless planted this letter to be funny. Wait till I get my paws on HIM OR HER!!

That's it. I'm done. No more practical jokes for me!!

Holy and smart,

Monday, October 29, 2018

Once Upon A Time

It's Monday. Mancat Monday. How many times have we done this???

The housekeeper is as daffy as they come. I really need to remind her that Monday is the day after Sunday, and a day that means a blog post from me.  All right. Forget about me. Just remember Mondays and the blog posts. In her defense, she's not in the rectory over the weekend, so she just waltzes back in here Monday morning, ready to hear the latest gossip, catch up on a few laughs, but not nearly ready to do her blogly duties.

Finally, she made her way into the office.

I think her idea of having me step in and provide my version of some of the fairy tales that are circulating around is a good idea. For instance:

Rapunzel didn't see the witch climbing up her long braid. She thought it was her handsome prince. From his cologne wafting upwards and my keen sense of smell, I always knew it was him. That day it was different, though. The witch had a scent more like onions, parsnips and walrus feces. After I finished with her, she never came back to bother my friend Rapunzel ever again. Me, a fairy tale hero!

In the following fairy tale, I saved my own butt, but actually by accident. The ogre I had to deal with turned himself into a mouse and I caught him! I didn't think he was very smart in the first place, so I didn't feel sorry for him, hanging onto his tail and eventually flinging him into a mud puddle.

As I purruse other fairy tales to improve upon, keep in mind that fairy tale happily ever afters apply to everyone - including my furry and human friends!

~ Tom

Monday, October 22, 2018

We Won! Look Out Palm Trees and Coconuts!

Hi, everybody!

I want to catch you all up on what happened last week and how it all ended. Good news - we won!
(after all, how could we not - I knew the judge, one of my best furriends, but only a pawful of people knew).

I've attached each day's activities here so you can see how things unfolded:

As they say, all's well that ends well.
Have a good week, everybody and watch those claws!


Monday, October 15, 2018

Incarcerated For No Reason

Hi, friends -

Is there any way I can live my life in peace? This is a parish. I am a clergyman who believes in prayer and minding my own business, and yet, I find myself arrested last night on charges of defacing church property.

It's an outrage, and the housekeeper wasn't even here to give them a piece of her mind.

The trial is unfolding this week. I have been remanded to the FurrCounty Jail which is horrible. I am innocent of all charges and I hope to find justice.

If you want to follow the day-by-day proceedings, go to

Here is what's circulating (between you and me, I know the judge. I hope she goes easy on me!):

Monday, October 8, 2018

Nursemaid and Mancat in the Same Sentence?

Hi, friends -

I have been tied up with a whining, incapacitated, helpless, fresh from hip surgery housekeeper who decided, since she's one of these Senior Orphans they call themselves, to recuperate at the rectory. I'm happy to say, though, that after ten days, she's up and around and, old Jack, swearing under his breath, is going to "unload her" at her place forthwith.

So, that's why I haven't posted anything. I've been busy. Please accept my excuses  apologies for being awol.

Autumn is here and the sun is a welcome friend after so many days of rain. I hope you get to enjoy a little peace and quiet among the drifting leaves and late afternoon shadows that seem to reach for the warmth we cats enjoy.

Should be back to normal next week.

Remember the words of our cat friend Colette: "What a wonderful life I've led. I wish I had realized it sooner."

Stay purry, my friends,

Monday, September 24, 2018

Getting Creeped Out

Hi, friends on this Mancat Monday!

I have to confess, sometimes I don't feel all that macho and I take this special day for us mancats to remind myself that I'm wise and strong. There are times, though, when I want to run and hide. Other times, I scratch my head (not for a flea) in puzzlement at some of the letters I get here at the rectory which give me the shivers. Like this one:

Here's what I said back (trying to be funny):

If some of these letters I've saved don't creep me out all over again, I'll share others the housekeeper has saved along with my letters back, She saves everything. It's a wonder she doesn't save my ... and sell them as holy relics!! Okay..okay.

Anyway, hope your Monday and the rest of the week goes well and remember: "Never be wide-eyed and scared when just a good hiss will do." 


Monday, September 17, 2018

I Be Nobody's Fool

Every time I get mad at the housekeeper, she redeems herself with some sappy, I-love-you-cuddles kinda stuff. I don't know what else to call it. I get treats, too, so eventually all is forgiven. What? Am I stupid? It's a game we play. Sometimes it gets completely out of hand, though.

Like with this. I decided to get really mad. I hadn't been upset with her shenanigans in awhile I realized, so I put on the furious, helpless pout I'm very good at.

Well, I got my message across and she swore she would never make fun of me again. I know that's a lie. It's also a sin, but I know she only goes to confession with Father Jack and probably makes up stuff just so we can hear him laugh all through the church when she's behind the curtain.

Oh, woe is me! What I have to put up with! This is just one example. There are many more, I assure you!

By the way, last I heard, the wanted poster went up on Facebook for all the world to see. I was shocked! I finally recovered and came up with suitable payback. I think I'll hurl on one of the dining room chairs for when her church ladies come over for lunch! I can see it now: all that happy chitchat, yack-yack, smiles and one of them sits down...hahahahaha!

Faithfully unthwarted,

Monday, September 10, 2018

A Stellar Weekend: How Was Yours?

Hey, guys!

I know, I skipped last Monday. I think it was a holiday and I was off somewhere, I don't even remember. Truth be told, I was probably on my cushion imagining all sorts of things. That's how I roll.

So, anyway, I want to tell you about my birthday. Now, you wouldn't think it would make biblical history, but I managed to have a celebration party amongst the Man and his disciples. Between you and me, I don't know how He can stand having them around. They're rowdy. Rude, and incapable of feeling other than for themselves. I don't have to tell you. Talk about "friends in low places!" I apologize for the fuzziness of the photo. Cameras weren't that good back then.

This was after I blew out the candle, my wish being they would all disappear in a puff of smoke, but it didn't happen. I wanted the good Lord all to myself, but I guess it was not to be.

I might have had a birthday disappointment, but friends on Facebook, in the rectory and the rest of the parish more than made up for it with their good wishes. I turned 10, a milestone they tell me. Gettin' to be an old man, but I couldn't be happier.

So, if you have a birthday coming up at some point, have a blast, gather all your friends and loved ones around, and enjoy special treats. Just don't invite any disciples!

Your crusty old soul,

Monday, August 27, 2018


So what's new?

On this Mancat Monday those are the three words that can trigger gossip in the worst way amongst the housekeeper and her lady friends. I think that's half the reason she works at the rectory. She can be right at the heart of everything that could possibly happen to the human race!

I swear she even has antennae to pick up signals and like some rusty old contraption with wheels and pulleys - in goes the gossip and chugga-chugga, whirr-whirr, bang bang - out comes her take on it.


So, anyway, enough making fun of her. Between you and me, I keep an eye on things myself and overhear plenty, without any effort at all.

That wraps up my weekly Monday post. I'll let you know if I hear any juicy bits or if the housekeeper short-circuits!!


Monday, August 20, 2018

A Rundown

Just like a pendulum swing, we're at the beginning of the week again!
(notice I don't mention the "M" word any more, haha!)

Hope you've all been well since we met here last. I've been beside myself - and I didn't even have to be standing by a mirror! The reverends and I each have our responsibilities. Jack, the older guy, has his buddies in the old parish school, now condos. He hangs out there a lot. I'm convinced some of them are a bad influence.

Will, the only one who understands me, has his own respective flock, people who like him, especially the ladies. Ooh-lala! Many a heart goes a-flutter when he gives the benediction!

Anyway, I don't know what the big deal is. He puts his pants on like every other priest.

And finally the housekeeper. I feel obligated to mention her, otherwise she might not feed me. She's okay. That's when she's not vacuuming, dusting, fretting, or gossiping. I take that back. If she didn't gossip, I couldn't eavesdrop.

So, that's my tribe and of course, all the people who make up the congregation, always keeping me on my toes!

Here are a couple I've been wanting to mention: I love these guys. They crack me up. Ed is on the left, Paul right.

(maybe I should suggest a good tailor, what do you think?)


Monday, August 13, 2018

Quaker Tom

Hi, effurrrybodies!

On the heels of a very busy Sunday (what happened to 'day of rest,' anyway?) I want to bring up the subject of my religious affiliation. Actually, I have none. I'm a priest and I hang out at a rectory with other like-attired guys, except for the fur, but that's it.

Now, it's been that way for years. However, the housekeeper who moonlights as a graphics nerd has come up with me if I, as a stray, had wound up with a bunch of Quakers at a meetinghouse instead of on her rectory doorstep. (I think the collar is a nice touch, haha!)

Listen guys, I don't want to encourage her should she get it in her head to make me some Buddhist monk or go through all the religions with my face plastered on them. It's taking ecumenical teachings a little too far.

So, please support me in my effort. Laugh all you want, but don't praise. That is, unless you think I would improve the face on Quaker Oats!

Your humble servant,

PS - Thanks to all of you for giving me your nicknames and opinions last week. Yes, Mouse Sniper was a favorite!

Monday, August 6, 2018

Calling Me Names

Hi, there..
Another pre-Tuesday in the works. No "M" word today!!

I want to talk about all the names I've been called and just names in general, quite the variety! Then there are those nicknames people love to come up with:

I kinda like Mouse Sniper. That came from an Army friend, who thinks in those terms. He told me once he had a friend who called his cat Hoosgow. I thought it was cool and he's probably the only cat on the planet with that name. Brig might be more a dog's name, haha!!

Cats' names can come from any of these:

A cat's coloring
We'll call him Grouse or Winston :)
Role in the house - (or in the parish, in my case, fish having a double meaning for me)
Named after a person
After being rescued - Lucky or Hope
A boy or girl's name
Or named after a candy - Like Truffle!

Other possibilities:
A royal name - Anastasia, e.g.
After someone the owner holds dear or a memory.
Something unique or funny

Do you have a name or nickname you'd like to share?

Finally, I'll leave you with the question: if the cat's name is Nick already, can he have a nick-name, too?

Preyingly yours,

Monday, July 30, 2018


Do you ever look at a title and wonder what a book or article is about?

Hey, sportsfans! It's Monday all over again and the start of another week.
Can you believe it's going to be August in two days? Try not to lose any naps over it, tho. It's coming and we can't stop it.

Okay, so what's been going on?
Have I been staying out of trouble?
Not a chance. I had the opportunity of a lifetime and you'll never guess!

I befriended a water god!
Here I am with King Triton. The only pets he ever had were fish, so I was happy to introduce him to the brighter side of pet parenting, that of having a cat. He catches the fish. I eat them. Good show!

Another thing that happened - I discovered someone got all artsy and put me at the bottom of a pool. I like this, although it's not deep enough for swimming, just wading. Wade a minute! Where you going?? Hehe

Okay, so now for the not-so-nice part. As you know, the housekeeper always has to stick her nose in where it doesn't belong and, because she was worried about me drowning, found a solution that has embarrassed the heck out of me. Here it is. Please, don't show this to anybody!

Can you believe it? Kiddie water wings!! On ME!!! Have you ever seen anything so stupid in your life??!!

Okay, so enough about me. Have you had a good summer so far?

Determined to sink my teeth into those annoying appendages, I am
Very truly yours,

Monday, July 23, 2018

Tom Fishworthy - Attorney-at-Law

A real mancat Monday post...hoo-ahh!!

I've often thought about practicing law. Oh, yeah, going to law school first, of course. Duh!

But, there are phrases that confuse me. Like "party of the first part," and so forth. It sounds like a jigsaw puzzle to me. Would I be able to put everything together? And, how about "innocent until proven guilty?" I have to confess, I'm very good at sniffing out bad guys, so I would be defending someone against my better cat judgment. Okay, I could work as a prosecutor. Maybe that's the route I would go...

But this? Wouldn't I have to wear a wig? What's with the wigs, anyhow? I think they look silly and make my head look fat.

Since I'm in the States, I guess wigs aren't a courtroom necessity, so that shouldn't keep me from the bar..

Besides, how could I resist torts? They sound really tasty!

All for now, good friends. If you get into a jam, I'll defend you with every fiber of my being. Just not before a judge.


Monday, July 16, 2018

Talents of Cats - Not Surprising At All

Hi, friends!

So many people tell me I'm talented for a cat, but I think all cats are talented. They prove it time and again, so those folks just need to be educated a little! (Dogs are talented, too)

As you can see in my sidebar, I have a special little furfriend who tried her best this week to do some writing on her own. She sees me write up stuff for my blog and, with the housekeeper, now have daily entries on my Facebook Page. She was so itchin' to try her paw at writing and she did!

Just last Friday, she presented me with a poem she wrote! It's quite good and she wanted so much for me to share it here.

With no further a-dew, put your paws together for the Keats of cats, Bridgie Mackenzie and her poem called SLEEP:

Sometimes i just have to step back and let other people shine.
A Note: I try to get to everyone and read your blogs, too. I just haven't figured out a way where I don't forget where I've been and where I need to go. I do try my bestest!

So, enjoy your week everyone! Get plenty of SLEEP!

Tom (zzzzzzzzz)

Monday, July 9, 2018

C'mon Over, The Water's Fine!

Hi, my poor sweltering friends!

I feel your pain. It's been so hot I can't even sit in the rectory window any more. The sun beating down and my water dish - ahem, oh holy men - sits with warmed up water.

Desperate, I sought out my favorite watering hole for saving souls and discovered something new they've added. A JACUZZI! My watering hole has water, haha *giggling* That's right! There at the Pearl and Swine, they've added a bubbly, cooling and refreshing jacuzzi.

I've been told I can invite my friends, so you're most welcome!

Ahhhh...heavenly furs upon my soul! This feels good!!

Don't let the water discourage you. You can always sip your beverage lying along the edge. I started out there, stuck a few toes in the water and then said the heck with it, plunged right in!

So, we'll be here most afternoons right after lunch. 

See you soon! (Nip is on the house)

Hey, I can hear confessions in here, haha!!


Monday, July 2, 2018

Always Something to Say

Hi, Mancat Monday friends!

I've never been at a loss for words. The only trouble is, they're usually not mine unless they're a reaction in the spur of the moment. Like when old lady Patsy Gubbers grabbed me in the confessional, rudely restrained me while at the same time waving my paw at Father Will.

"Put me down, you scrawny old bag!" I said. Of course, she doesn't understand me which is good. She'd be offended, but then forget all about it. Will is the only one who understands what I say which cracks him up.

I overhear sayings like this which are kinda cool - but for me, confusing:

So when does past begin? Oh, and then there's the expression "ancient history." Uh-oh. I'm over-thinking again.

The housekeeper collects quotes and sayings, so there's always a bunch of them.

There are some I remember and others I'm glad to forget.

There's one little saying which I heard and happily remember but never shared with anybody since I heard it before I became a man of the cloth. Would you like to know what it is?

It's a little on the romantic side. Let's see if I remember how it goes:

"I ran up the door, opened the stairs, said my pajamas and put on my prayers, 
turned off my bed, tumbled into my light
And all because he kissed me good night."

Isn't that sweet? I truly am a softie.

Do you have anything you want to share? If not, that's ok. Just give me a howdy!

Ramblingly yours,

Monday, June 25, 2018

Monday Meanderings

Okay, so last week we talked about words. Today, I bring to you images..right-o, they are images of moi, but I thought they might cheer you on what is turning out to be a dismal day at the rectory. It seems the whole world has turned into one big pout under dark skies.

Let's start with my feet.

Sunshine adds glamor to any cat's feet.

Then, there's the rest of me

Ooopsie, so this isn't me, but it's how I've envisioned myself lately. A private eye. A gumshoe. A seeker of justice in a mysterious world.

Have an issue that makes no sense?
Is someone around you acting suspiciously?
Did someone take an object you hold dear?
Is there a possible way out of the house you haven't thought of?

I can help.

Just ring me up or come to my office at One Five Oh Spill Lane. I'm on the second floor, my name in gold letters on frosted glass, can't miss it. Come on in and say hello to my secretary. Patience of a saint, she has..

Hope this helped you forget about what day it is...

Have a good week.

PS - If my secretary isn't at her desk, just leave footprints and I'll track you down..


Monday, June 18, 2018

Guise or Disguise?

A heavy question, boys and girls!

Because we don't react, people don't think we take in anything. So wrong, right?

Anyway, this weekend I heard this ridiculous debate between guises and disguises. This went on and on in the rectory den between Jack and Will. What's the difference? Even though I was napping behind Will's head, I finally became so disgusted with hearing about it, I mumbled, "Oh, shut up!" Will got the giggles and Jack wondered what that was all about. The younger priest said nothing.

Disguises, of course, is when we hide behind something and people don't know who we are. Like so:

You didn't know this was me at first, did you? Of course not. *wink wink*

Now, guise without the "dis" means...wait, I have to look it up cuz I forgot. Okay, let me get past the words groin and guinea fowl.and hackney. Now I've gone too far...

Here it is: guise means "assumed behavior." So the man was acting in the guise of a detective, although not a detective in reality. But, you knew who he was.

Anyway, I hope I'm on the right track relating all of this. The two priests mentioned the housekeeper and the graphics she's created around me. These, I think are guises since I'm not hiding:

Wolfie says: "Oh my, but red looks so good on you!"

Here I'm acting as one of General Washington's men:

And, here I am once again in disguise:

And, finally, there's always Lucy in disguise with diamonds..teehee:
(which is how the whole stupid conversation ended, with everyone laughing, including me!)

So, my friends, keep your ears peeled and have a great week. Don't eat anything that smells suspicious and look for those hands with long nails for a most heavenly scratch.


Monday, June 11, 2018

I'm Bustin' Out All Over!

Hey, everybody! I've some news!

The housekeeper has outdone herself (don't think on this too long, hehe)..

She wrote an article about my breed, the Maine Coon and I do believe she has done us all justice. I don't know how many of you have some of that wild, burly, can-do spirit in you, but they say there's a little Maine Coon in all us adventure types.

Here's the article she wrote: The Maine Coon: Just One Cool Cat  (that's me!)

So, I guess that's the highlight of the past week. Of course, I'm all over just have to key in Fr. Tom Fishworthy and you're all set. Thanks to all of you who have taken an interest! More is coming!

I was so excited about the article that I composed a sea shanty song. Next on-board outing, you're welcome to come along!

Heigh-ho, heigh ho...

I’m a Maine Coon and the sea
It awaits me
The rats on the ship will prove
Quite tasty..

I’m ready for sea squalls and 
Salt spray galore
My thick furs and can-do
Say “Even the score!”

Fellow kitties are happy
They smile every day
Drinkin’ catnippin’ whiskey
Packin’tuna away

Never fear we’ll reach shore
Thanks to heavens above
Ratted, tunaed and whiskeyed
Finding furladies to love.

Heigh-ho, heigh-ho..

Swimmingly yours,