I decided this week I would help out a little around here by finding myself some part-time work, and I've come to the most interesting conclusion.
ANY JOB THAT INVOLVES STRING IS OUT
I thought I had a good chance at getting a job as a puppeteer. You laugh, but I'm telling you, I was a shoo-in.
I was good at manipulating string and I could make the parrot do anything I wanted it to do. After all, I was a cat, wasn't I?
The interviewer said I had remarkable skill with my paws, but it was the string that was holding me back, distracting me, making me want to play instead.
My furriends, I totally embarrassed myself. I was playing instead of auditioning for the job! I recovered by saying the whole thing should be a cat toy, anyway.
We shook paws and I left, but I learned a lesson. I wasn't going to be like the puppeteer in the Sound of Music...odlayeeeeoooooo, darn it.
Not if there are strings attached!
Here are some suggestions the next time you're out looking for work:
JOB HUNTING TIPS FOR CATS
1. Enter the reception area, meow your arrival, and take a seat. Do not sniff corners, chair legs or turn the butt toward the lady behind the desk.
2. Remember to bring phone numbers for references. No Twitter handles, blog nicknames, or names of best buds now in the slammer.
3. Wear a collar. This is expected. It should be conservative, indicate gender without any over the top flairs. And, this is not the time to play guess my after-shave.
4. Look intelligent. No funny faces or goofy smiles or Tickle Me Elmo imitations.
5. Get to your appointment on time. That means no alleys, no nip stops, and watch the fish breath.
Pee ess: We might want to share some of this advice with our woofie furriends, too, hehe!